Tuesday, December 11, 2012

The Start

I've decided I need some kind of anonymous outlet.  (I'd like to take bets as to how long I stay anonymous, I'm not good with secrets.) So here it goes...

As I type this, BabyGirl is banging at the computer.  At least the boys are hanging out and aren't trying to kill each other today.  Hubby is playing some game on his computer.  Not a productive night around here.

I was once a working mother.  But when Baby #3 was about to be introduced to our family, we decided (ok, maybe it was just me who decided) that there was no point in dishing out all that moolah to a daycare.  I definitely wasn't ready to be a SAHM when I had Baby#1, our First Born Son.  I felt like I was counting the days for when it was time for me to return to work.  I did take the entire allotted 12 weeks, and am grateful that I did.  BUT was oh so grateful to get back to my nine to fiver.  It took some of the pressure off of me.  I knew how to be an accountant, but had no idea how to be a mother.  

With Baby#2, Second Born Son, I wasn't quite as eager to return to work, but it was not feasible for me to stay home at that point.  Plus, I'm not quite sure I was ready then.   When Second was about 2, I got laid off.   It gave me a taste of SAHM, but I felt like I couldn't commit to it.  I didn't plan things to do with him while his brother was in Kindergarten.  Mostly because I was looking for another job EVERY DAY.  And I never knew when I'd be called for an interview.  So Poor Second and I had very few planned outings.  During that time, my father-in-law was living with us.  So, in a way it was a blessing to be laid off at that time.  He was getting more sick, and it was helpful that I was here to help him out.  But during that time, I felt like I got a lot of that one on one time that Second hadn't really gotten with being #2.  So, I began to change my mindframe, and gave myself a deadline.  My "find a job or you're staying home full time" deadline.  Of course, I found that job 2 weeks before I hit my deadline.  

After careful timing (making sure I would be at this place for the required year before giving birth) we went for it.  Went for #3 hoping for a girl.  We got her!  And that was it. After maternity leave, I was officially a SAHM. I was definitely ready this time. 

Well, I guess this will conclude my first entry. I know I'll have so much more to write, not knowing if anyone will ever read this.

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